Wanted to ask some learned men of deen on this v impt question of my life for a v long time, Alhamdulillah found this source after 13 long years.
In short i have been married to a man who had joint family with 24 ppl in it, i wanted to do purdah and practice deen but always had hurdles for 7 long years we lived together(had 2 miscarraiges due to stress always), me serving everyone as i was taught to, by my mother, never to return back home.
After we seperated the 8th year husband became unhappy, cursed me always that he was unable to support us, me and my 3 children. As deen says to obey husband in every aspect, i started working in a girls college when my last kid was 6 months. (Always cried at college due to guilt) now working while traveling 175 kilometers daily to a far off govt college as i got a govt job this year. Husband forced me to take loan (mental tortures daily) so took a loan for 21 lakhs which has to be repaid as 28 lakhs in 5 years. (Never wanted to work and give tarbiyah to my children instead) that loan was to own the family home where all 24 ppl lived , my money being given as share equally among his 4 brothers and one uncle.
My main point here is again My Husband/inlaws (mother and father in law) wants me to do all household work after returning from work at night as they started again living with us from 2 years. (prior to taking loan i kept 2 house maids but now wasn’t possible) should i travel 174 kms and then serve my children as well as these old ppl? Please advice it is taking away all my energy and am dreaming for death as i am physically weak had 4 ceasarians also.
Asalamoalikum,Dear Sister, all the things you did. inshaALLAH you will surely get reward of those.Husband have no right to take money from you by asking you to take loan.Sister islam gives choice to women too. if situation is unbearable you can share your options to your husband.If they are not good with you and things are unbearable for you then you can choose other side.Stay where you feel peace of mind.Regards,